July 14, 2005
Surprise, Gemini
Despite the fact that Sakura Taisen is currently on our List of Things About Which We Wish People On The Internet Would Shut The Fuck Up, we cannot stress enough how much we have fallen head over heels in love with Gemini Sunrise, star of Sega's Sakura Taisen V Episode 0. And while any artistic endeavor that suffixes itself with a "Episode Something Or Other" descriptor causes us to shudder and reflexively twist our neck in disgust, as it reminds us of those horrible Star Wars movies, we continue to obsess over Gemini. Gaze upon her Texan loveliness.
*SIGH*
Look at those lovely blue, grotesquely oversized eyes. We could swim in those for days! If only she were flesh and blood! Those freakishly large misshapen POOLS OF RADIANCE might induce vomiting, but we'd give ANYTHING to know her in real life and take the chance to become violently ill in her presence.
Alas, as many internet denizens will tell you, the relationship one has with anime personalities often bears little sweet fruit. Our solution? We're trying desperately to mold our real life girlfriend to be more like Gemini. It's proving difficult. The only progress we've made is gently coaxing her into wearing this Cospa outfit:
Unfortunately, based on our garage kit collections, she knows that we'll have the best intentions for at-home cosplay, but will eventually put her in any number of humiliating poses.
Our only other options are to (1) continue to write romantic fanfics (aka ROMANFICS™!) about Gemini, fooling ourselves into thinking we'll meet her someday, (2) travel to the Sakura Cafe in Tokyo and drink her signature cocktail, knowing her with biological intimacy or (3) cry ourselves to sleep, knowing that our TRUE 16-YEAR OLD, SWORD WIELDING, MECH PILOTING COWGIRL LOVE will never be ours.
*SOB* GOODNIGHT!
Posted by geek